'Twas The Night Before X-mas

I love the holiday season.

My bff and I had Korean food this afternoon and exchanged gifts! (Still lovin' it, thanks!)

My mom roasted a delicious turkey and a ham hock for dinner. Protein for the MEN.

Pie and eggnog galore, paired with A Christmas Story.

Aaron (my mom's bf) gave me a pretty sweet gift: a GPS!! Seriously needed this.

As my brother's creeping through my Facebook tonight:

Keep in mind that he's only a sophomore in high school and doesn't know things.

"Why are people posting pictures of their ghetto dinner? Oh nevermind, this person has a ham."

"You're actually friends with people I don't know, I'm surprised."

"I've never seen this girl in my life. I'm gonna look and see what she's doing."

"Who's myyy-riuh? Is she a singer? She looks like a singer! No wait, she's fake. SO FAKE!"

ALSO, he walks in my room saying he has a gift for me.

He has never gotten me a gift before.

He pulls out this piece of paper, and....it's a Valvoline sticker.

"It's for your car!! It's heavy duty!!"

I tell him thanks and he walks into his room.

HE COMES BACK OUT, holding this carabeener loopy thing.

"Okay, how about this. It holds your water bottle and you can clip it on your pants! All the juggalos have one!"

I don't know where he gets these objects.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Well, I found these little treasures while spending aimless hours on stumbleupon.

I just get so eager on Christmas Eve in hopes that Santa will come that I cannot slumber.

Merry Christmas!!!!!

Kid's say the cutest things. I hope my kids are like this:

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/270O9K/m.funnyordie.com/slideshows/4b071b52a5/distressing-letters-from-kids/

It's funny cause it's true. Well, some of it. Hence, funny:

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/Altr2X/thecareercloset.com/2009/11/21/things-you-learn-in-college/

Feelin' like wearing man-pris and sipping Oolong tea? Promise you haven't heard of half the bands on this list:

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/1tlt5M/en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_indie_pop_artists/

You want one? I'm makin'!

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/73pS02/honestlywtf.com/diy/diy-wrap-bracelet/

You don't a gym to be sexaay. This at-home routine burns so good. I've done it before!

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/21k9tB/iowagirleats.com/wpcontent/uploads/2011/11/Fitness.jpg/

How To Be Obscure

This little fashion statement is called the "Turband"

Turban + headband = turband.

You can only do that in the english language.

My brother keeps calling me "Jihad" in reference to terrorists.

My mom said I look like a soldier with a head wound.

Goll...THE WAR IS OVER, FOLKS!

C'mon. Is it that bad?

I bought this satin scarf at H&M for $1.

ONE. POOPIN. DOLLAR. $$$$

Yes, I am planning on wearing this in public.

Try this and love it.

Boys Don't Rate Girls For Funniness

This Christmas season is especially bangin'.

I was lucky enough to be a part of Jessie's Third Annual Ugly Christmas Sweater Party.

I'm super exclusive now!....But I'm not excited or anything; that's too mainstream.

There was a to-die-for dinner and dessert made by Jessie and friends, crafts, games, gift exchanges, and, to our viewing pleasure, "Angus, Thongs, and Full Frontal Snogging."

"Brett is so hot!"

I wish I knew what this was about.

Megan, if you're reading this, I just macked on the shirt you got me for a solid 5 minutes.

With tongue.

Is that weird? Course not. I love it that much. Thanks again!

I had way too much fun.

Jessie is a great hostess.

All the girls were too funny.

I still want to be Emilee.

Feast upon my photos.

Beautiful Jess!

The shirt Megan got me! (The best time to wear a striped sweater.... is all the time.)

Family Photo!

Sooo much love for you guys!

Dedicated to the Sexy Harvard's. Yum.

Cecilia and Daryl Harvard.

I love you guys.

I am so happy you found each other, and that I was able to be there along the way to see your relationship grow.

You two are absolutely great individually and even better together!

I love how much the spirit radiates from you both, and am ever so thankful for the friendship we have made throughout the years!

Temple marriage is an amazing accomplishment in one's life; you guys have set a great example for the rest of us who are single!!

Daryl, don't ever stop doing your one voice!

Cecilia, you're going to be gorgeous forever and I'll just have to get over it! Hahaha :)

May your happiness and love extend to all parts of your life here on earth and thereafter!

Being At Home For the Holidays

Just some strange things that have been running through my peanut of a head.

Something's wrong with my face.

I can't stop breaking out.

Now that Im at home for three weeks, I can isolate myself in my house and put a medley of creams on.

Woe is me.

Aside from the acne, it's just great to be home.

I'm finally eating yummy homemade meals and watching some much needed TV (I live for MTV'S Made and True Life. CLASSIC.)

Can't get over the fact that my mom only has 2% milk in the house now.

Gag. Too creamy.

On the other hand, my pantry looks super cool now.

It's chock-full of organized food.

We have enough mac & cheese and Campbell's soup to last us months in case a freak natural disaster ever occurred.

Right above my brother's bedroom door, there's this gnarly, dead spider.

It's been there for, oh, maybe TWO MONTHS.

He explained to me that he doesn't just kill spiders, he OVER-kills them because he hates them so much. The dead spider is supposed to be a warning to all other spiders.....Goll, what a spazz.

How he reached above his door frame to kill the spider, I don't know.

Why he still hasn't cleaned it up after so long, still don't know.

Will it even come off the wall anymore? It's super crusty. Ew.

American media has issues.

Since when did PG-13 become R, and R become rated XXX.

Too many nudey parts and fudge bombs.

Which are supposed to make amazing movies, no?

There's only so much of Justin Timberlake I wanna see.

Which is mostly NONE of him, since he has Ramen for hair and unattractive everything (right, Miyuki?!)

Guess I'll just watch the Disney Channel the rest of my life.

I just really love cereal.

I had it for breakfast and lunch.

My Cousins Show Me Cool Things

"The Most Offensive Picture in the World."

Monday's Are the Epitome of Suck

You'll never guess...

Today, I broke the shower in my dorm.

It just wouldn't stop dripping!!

Chinese water torture, I tell ya.

So I yanked the handle as far as it would go.

Not only is the shower handle broken, but the shower is....still....dripping.

Yes, my roommates did laugh their heads off, and yes, they secretly despise me because now they can't shower until it's fixed.

Forgiveness would be awesome, thanks.